If Atlanticist politicians in the United Kingdom opted to borrow the inaugural ball or correspondents’ dinner from the United States, perhaps on the coronation of Theresa May somebody could have co-opted a Don Rickles joke, witheringly complimenting the departing David Cameron by telling the gathered hangers-on ‘He’s a wonderful guy. You talk to him, it’s like being alone’.
The ‘wonderful’ would be too kind but otherwise the sentiment seems true of Cameron. Because although he left Downing Street just a couple of months ago, was praised during his time in office for purported displays of wit in the Commons even though his remarks were typically irrelevantly and insultingly snide, and ought already to be recalled as one of the most incompetent and destructive Prime Minister’s in British history, in another sense if feels as though he was hardly ever here. As a character and as a politician Cameron often appeared completely vacuous. But then that was always one of his biggest strengths.
This cipher, who existed only for the material benefit of himself and his friends, never seemed bright enough to be responsible for the most despised policies implemented by his government. Sweeping to power after thirteen long years of Labour, the country was ready for change and easily convinced of the need to cut spending. But as austerity became increasingly political, besides failing to right the economy while being swiftly rejected by most the rest of the world, the project became entwined in the public consciousness with George Osborne’s sickly smirk. Ian Duncan Smith whooped and hollered over the bedroom tax and benefit cuts. And Michael Gove struggled to get to grips with education. The things everyone hated about the Conservative government were each blamed on someone else.
Cameron was left to mainline on populist anti-immigration, an easy if ever more vile crowd-pleaser, which was also a vote winner as it could be used to distinguish the Tories from Labour, and which played to his party’s right as it was also vehemently anti-EU. The EU and EU migration is the least of Britain’s problems: Britain depends on workers from the EU, who are overwhelmingly young and well educated, who are the only group who offer a net contribution to the public purse, and who anyway number less than non-EU migrants, a group whose size is supposedly already susceptible to the elusive notion of ‘control’. But Cameron’s rhetoric effortlessly riled the man in the street.
In the meantime Cameron decided to invade Libya, an intervention subsequently called a ‘shitshow’ by President Obama, which has now been sternly criticised in a Commons report. Widely considered to have been based on flawed intelligence, and utterly lacking in concern for the post-Gaddafi aftermath, the intervention authorised by the United Nations but led by France and Britain flung Libya into political and economic turmoil, as the country became divided among tribes and militias, allowing for the rapid ascent of so-called Islamic State. The fallout from the Iraq War and the situation in Libya are two of the major drivers of Europe’s migrant crisis.
Despite such catastrophic mistakes, Cameron’s downfall only came when he absurdly lost an EU referendum vote which the tenor of his own premiership had already ensured he was unlikely to win. The ‘remain’ campaign marked another failure of leadership, at least if Cameron really was putting in any effort. And then he quit his position in the early hours of the Brexit morn despite stating numerous times that win or lose, he would stick to his post. When Andrea Leadsom stepped aside to end the Tory leadership contest prematurely, Cameron quickly made way for May.
The decision he made this week to leave the Commons altogether, waving goodbye to his role as Witney MP, may owe something to the way May has marginalised him and his companions, and to the new government’s apparent zeal for a fresh uptake of grammar schools. But it also comes conveniently as attention returns to Libya. And it frees him from prying eyes over his financial concerns. So Cameron will slink off into a Tuscan or Cornwall sunset, enjoying spit roasts with his friends like George Osborne and Rebekah Brooks, spending the remainder of his evenings cosy in front of the fire with his wife Samantha, as they nibble their preferred supper of roast chicken and Hellman’s mayonnaise.
