Ahhh, there’s nothing quite like a nice warm shower! Especially in winter, when after daring off cosy covers from the bedroom to the bathroom you’re forced to tread cold floors, and only stop shivering once your body’s under the water, or when you come home sodden and have to strip the clinging clothes from your hide, before the respite of a replacing a damp sensation with a hot one. In moments like these a shower feels just like heaven.
But when the lather has been and gone and wet time is over, what comes after? A towel of course, unless you adopt the drip-dry method, which tends to leave puddles and shows scanty concern for whomever comes next. Towels are not only practical, but can take the showering experience to a whole new level. So here are five tips towards using your towel for an exuberant, emollient post-shower treat.
Toast Your Towel (And Serve)
Some people like to use a towel fresh out of the washer-dryer, basking in the crunchy glow of its crispy warmth. But what makes things crispier or warmer than a toaster? Of course these days towels come in all shapes and sizes, and toasters with dozens of attachments to boot. With a small folding towel and the relevant accruement, you can heat your clothpiece real toasty and nice. Don’t forget the butter!
Spritz Your Towel In Oud
It’s basic science. When the pores are open right after a warm shower, what better than to drench yourself in oud, perchance from someplace in southeast Asia? The product of trees infected with mould, which then begin to produce a dark aromatic resin, in recent years ouds have almost overtaken the fragrance industry. Every perfume house has one, so spritz your towel with Dolce & Gabbana’s Velvet Tender Oud, which opens with sweet almonds, or Dior’s Leather Oud, to render yourself with a fecal smell. Some of this stuff is so potent that your towel will be left stinking of it for many washes to come.
Do-It-Yourself With Holes
Taking its cue from the do-it-yourself punk movement, all you’ll need for this one is a towel and a pair of trusty scissors. Simply cut indiscriminate holes into your bath towel, and as you rub those holes will cause tingling abrasions, not to mention giving your loved ones a cheeky peek!
Wrap Your Feet In Swaddling
Have you ever seen plants wrapped in burlap? Unlike humans, who will sometimes wrap a towel about their head, come the winter time plants like a burlap covering about their base. Roleplay as a plant and do likewise, letting the last remnants of your watery shower drip-drop onto a towel encircled round your feet.
Wrought Your Towel Into A Whip
Religiosity is in vogue this season. So for a final after-shower thrill, twirl your towel into a whip – sometimes known as a rat’s tail – and lash at your moist back until the skin flays and the cheeks glow.
