As Theresa May sets about the arduous task of replacing all the paintings in her new Downing Street home – she reportedly intends to swap artworks from the Government Art Collection for framed quotations drawn from the speech she made upon becoming Prime Minister less than two weeks ago – one minor problem has emerged, but nobody seems willing to tell her about it.
In her brief speech outside the front door of 10 Downing Street – in fact, May will live next door, in a flat above number 11 – she focused on the topic of inequality, bemoaning ‘burning injustice’ in the areas of education, criminal justice, and workers’ pay, before pledging a government ‘for everyone’ not just the ‘privileged few’.
The idea is to keep her aides motivated as they mill about the nooks and crannies closest to power. May hopes to quiz her workers on her quotes every three-to-six months, with stern reprisals for those who haven’t been staring at the walls in rapt attention.
The only issue is that the phrases listed above are all that remain of May’s inaugural speech. The theme of inequality was so alien to her aides, who were more used to despotic rhetoric around immigration and deportation, that they failed to write her speech down or record it to tape, fearing that their leader would be held to promises she had no intention of keeping.
The fiasco is reminiscent of the pilot to the popular American political sitcom Parks and Recreation. There the character of Leslie Knope, a mid-level bureaucrat, notes that ‘From time to time, when I think of an eloquent saying or a phrase, I have Tom write it down. He’s collecting them for my memoirs’. But when the camera turns to Tom, Leslie’s subordinate, he shows only a page full of scribbles. He has not bothered to take down any of Leslie’s mundane sayings.
A stern and serious woman who wants the world of politics to forget the frippery and listen intently to what she has to say, May will not take kindly when one of her aides meekly informs her about the absence of quotes. She has already pulled more than a dozen paintings from the gilded frames in which they hung, intending to transfer the frames for the sake of her own quotations. But will her quotes be adorning the walls of Downing Street any time soon? Just ask Leslie, the answer is ‘Knope!’.
