For a whole year now you’ve been gazing fondly at last year’s heart-shaped box of Valentine’s chocolates, fingering tenderly the hollowed out plastic insert and the curved piece of red card, and remembering how the treats tasted and the surprise on the face of your lover, and the night of tender romance which swiftly ensued.
Of course your partner would never toss such a gift of loving devotion, and after all who were you to refuse? Sure at times as the box cluttered up the kitchen counter, the memory of its flavours started to seem more than a little bittersweet. But as Cupid once again draws his bow, it’s time to turn that box to new uses, which means more than simply finding new edibles to suit.
So here are five other ways to befriend the environment while simultaneously beguiling your love. Some are foodie, some full of frivol, but either way there’s nary a cocoa bean in sight.
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Mud Cakes For Two
Perhaps your heart-shaped box contains heart-shaped holes, or else simple circles, rectangles, or conventional squares? Contrary to popular opinion no shape is more romantic than any other, and even true love must on occasion be hard-edged. Whatever the shape and state of your plastic insert, fill the lot up with mud, and show your bosom companion that while your face might wither, your mind remains playful and ever-young.
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A Mould For Jello (Or An Excuse For Shots)
Is the passion that burns within enough to boil water? Does your penchant for stickiness extend to gelatine leaves? Mix both together and add some fruity flavour, before placing your Valentine’s box firmly into the fridge. If you’re feeling especially naughty, a drop of vodka will make your partner’s hips wobble and their knees weak.
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Salmon Canapés Add A Touch Of Class
‘What’s that fishy smell?’, with a scrunched-up nose comes the query from your lover. It’s your decorative salmon, and hopefully it hasn’t gone off. Get some crispbreads or blinis to serve as a base, trim off the excess and press them into your box, top with cream cheese, sour cream, or crème fraîche, and squash your smoked salmon with a splodge right down in the middle, sprinkling over just a smidgen of dill. Did you know that salmon is one of nature’s best aphrodisiacs?
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Puzzle Together Over This DIY Jigsaw
After all unlike love a Valentine’s box cannot last forever, and by keeping it one year you’ve done better than most. So cut up the box into eight or more pieces, and in the arms of a puzzle while the evening away, putting aside for a moment the pleasures of the flesh and instead experiencing the commingling of two harmonious brains.
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Bath Bombs Make Scents
Is anything more languorous, and is anything more sensuous than a shared bath? Fill your Valentine’s remnant with miniature bath bombs or else crumbled up pieces of soap, and lavish your love with with flattering fragrances, with relaxing redolences, and with erotic aromas as the stresses of the day seep away and the suds begin sustaining your private parts.
